Feeling blue? Buy some clothes
Feeling lonely? Pick up the phone
Feeling down? Rent a DVD
Feeling bored? Watch TV
Feeling empty? Eat a Sundae
Feeling worthless? Close a deal
Feeling anxious? Hit the spa
Feeling isolated? Go online
Feeling sad? Tell a joke
Isn't this an amazing age?
We don't have to feel anything.
There's a substitute for everything.
God help us!
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